All I really want in life…


Is a freaking purse that doesn’t fall off of my shoulder all the time!!! It doesn’t have to be Coach or Prada or Gucci or anything fancy… a 14 dollar Wal-Mart purse will be just fine if it stays on my goddamn shoulder.

Maybe I need to become a hunchback with one huge shoulder, only mine could have a neat groove where my purse strap goes. As long as it stays I wouldn’t mind becoming grotesque.

OK… that’s a lie. I would rather be beautiful than have my purse stay up.

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