Five things you’d rather not know about me..


Since Grant did it, and Dirty did it, I’ll do it.

1. When I was in Tech School for the Air Force, I was “Latrine Queen”. This meant I was in charge of cleaning the bathroom. I was an awesome Latrine Queen. The bathroom was spotless… shiny, no mold or mildew. The Latrine Queen was keeper of “The Golden Toilet Brush”, and it got handed down whenever a new Latrine Queen was chosen. Since that Air Force Base is no longer open (Chanute in Rantoul, Ill.) I bet the Golden Toilet Brush is no more.

2. I rode the short bus. When I was in 9th grade my family was moving. My grandparents happened to live in the school district where we were moving, so I lived with them for a couple of months… the only bus that came near their house that also went to my school was the short bus.

3. I’ve seen the movie “The Goonies” more times than I can count, and I could watch it over and over and over still. I just love it. I want to be a Goonie. I even used to daydream that they would make a sequel and I could be in it. Also, Ellen Degeneres had a contest on her show a while back… something like “Ellen can make it happen”… I wrote and told her I wanted to be a Goonie. I never heard back.

4. The very first erotic dream I ever had (7th grade-ish) was about Tom Cruise. This was when Top Gun was all the rage. The dream wasn’t erotic at all, but it sure felt like it when I woke up from it. I dreamt that he French kissed me with Cheetos in his mouth.

5. I never liked Menudo. Most of the girls I went to middle school with were fucking insane about Menudo. I didn’t get it. I still don’t. I even remember them being on Silver Spoons. I was crazy about Ricky Schroder, why the hell did Menudo have to be on his show? He was plenty cute enough, he didn’t need Menudo.


25 Responses to “Five things you’d rather not know about me..”

  1. 1 Mr. Fabulous

    So much I could say…brain overheating…pain…

  2. 2 Nobody

    I’ve seen the Goonies, but I didn’t like it. And I never understoond the Menudo thing either. Those guys were gay, not that there’s anything wrong with that.

  3. 3 Amy

    How could you not like the Goonies??

    You are dead to me.

  4. 4 Scarlet

    Ellen NEVER wrote back!!

    Oh thats it. I’m writing a very strong letter to her right NOW. She can’t get away with this. For 20 years you have wanted to be a Goonie and you asked for your wish to come true.

    Bwahahahahhahaha I can’t **cough cough** keep straight **can’t breathe** face any longer!! Bwahahahaha

  5. 5 Amy

    Fine, make fun of me and my dreams. But none of you will get to be a Goonie with me. None of you will get to go on a Goonie adventure, with waterslides and ugly people chasing you, and skeletons and treasures.

    And rocky road ice cream and Baby Ruth.

    None of you.

  6. 6 Valerie

    oh, the stories I could tell you about the boys from Chanute. 😉

    GOONIES ROCKS! I think that was the first movie that my parents dropped me off at and I met my friends at the theater. I had the hugest crush on Sean Astin.

    I’m with you, I never liked Menudo either.

    We’re two peas in a pod!

    (Except I hate cleaning the toilet).

  7. 7 Valerie

    oh, and super crazy about “The Ricker.”

    make my ten year old heart swoon!

  8. 8 Amy

    I was all about Sean Astin too, Valerie.

  9. 9 teri

    I loved the Goonies.

    Hated Menudo! I was actually a little older therefore Menudo were for the kiddies. pffftttt

  10. 10 Lee

    Amy—why the hell can’t I remember what my job was in tech school? Did I have one? oh yeah, that’s right….I was busy being busted back to first phase for drinking!


    Love ya sweets.

  11. 11 yash

    why did they call it “Golden”?

  12. 12 dirty

    My kids ride the short bus. We live on a little side street just 3 blocks from the school but the bus still comes down our road…and I being the lazy parent that I am make them ride it. My kids say that there are car seats and seat belts on it…hahaha.

  13. 13 Amy

    Teri- you will be allowed to be a Goonie with me. And Valerie.

    Lee- ahhh… first phase. The good old days. NOT.

    Yash- sorry, it was actually spray painted gold.

    Dirty- there were seatbelts on mine, and I would help the bus driver wheel the kids that actually needed the short bus on and off, and strap them in.

  14. 14 coffeypot

    I really like The Goonies, too. In fact, me and the grandkids set and watched it a few weeks ago. A whole new generation of Goonies was born.

    Thanks for serving. What did you do besides scrub toilets? And let’s hear some of the “war stories” from Chanute. I was in radar on a Tin Can in the Navy. Ahoy, mate.

  15. 15 Marni

    Goonies is the best! OMG! THE BEST!

    Menudo is the worst! OMG! THE WORST!

  16. 16 Marni

    AND, now you have gone and done it… you have told my dad you were in the Navy… geesh… 🙂

  17. 17 coffeypot

    Marni, baby, I was in the Navy. Amy was in the Air Force. geesh!

  18. 18 Marni

    Sorry about that! Selective retention… they are all military… aren’t they all the same?!!! 🙂

  19. 19 Amy

    I don’t think they are all the same. I picked the Air Force because it sounded easiest….LOL!

    Have you seen some of the shows about Marines? No thanks.

  20. 20 Dale

    I never saw The Goonies. I’m pretty sure this makes me a bad person.

  21. 21 Amy

    So so bad, Dale. Your life just won’t be complete until you see it.

  22. 22 Just Dave

    “Rocky ROOOOAAAD???” Poor John Matuszak. Lived fast and died young.I watch this movie pretty well anytime I see that it is coming on.

  23. 23 mixednut

    Favorite line:
    “Jeez mister, you’re even hungrier than I am!” – Chunk

  24. 24 mixednut

    Favorite line:
    “Jeez mister, you’re even hungrier than I am!” – Chunk

  25. I hated Menudo too, as well as all the boys band at this period. 🙂

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